Today, I quit.

At least once a month I get overcome with discouragement and want to quit. 

I've been working harder on pursuing my dream of being an ARTrepreneur than anything else I've ever done. I show up every day to do the work. I put in long hours. I plan the best I know how. I'm leaning into those areas where I am weak or need knowledge and guidance. I'm doing all the things that those blog posts, websites and online courses say to do. 

The part of chasing your dream that not many people talk about is the intensity of emotion that can wash over you like a title wave. What happens when you're doing all the "right" things and you still don't seem to have the traction or results you desire?

On days like that where opportunities seem scarce, sales are low and the proverbial phone isn't ringing, this voice comes, and whispers in my ear. “Quit. This is too hard. No one cares about you or your art. Why put yourself through this? Why put your family through this?”

And then the voice plays real dirty. It reminds me of the pain of the past. Past failures. Depression. It reminds me of the pain of loosing finances, loosing jobs, loosing a community, having had to sell our house, wondering what to do next, and if this was what life would look like from now on... Experiences so painful that they still have sting to them years later. 

The voice tries to tell me that if it happened once, it could happen again. And I just can't bear to go through that again. I wouldn't survive.

And there it is. The predisposition to let the past dictate the future.

In his book, Shut Your Monkey, Danny Gregory talks about the inner critic as being a monkey. The monkey likes to keep us from becoming who we’re meant to become, and tries to prevent us from doing the work we are meant to do. His advice is to acknowledge the monkey but then tell him to shut it! Don't let him convince you to quit.

Truthfully, sometimes we do need to quit. But we need to learn to quit the right things. So instead of giving up on your dream, quit something else.

Quit the self doubt. Quit listening to that negative voice. Quit the "What If’s". Quit feeding the fear. Quit living out of past experiences. Quit the scarcity mentality. Quit complaining. Quit feeling sorry for yourself. 

But DON'T quit on YOU. 

“Quitting is not giving up, it’s choosing to focus your attention on something more important. Quitting is not losing confidence, it’s realizing that there are more valuable ways you can spend your time. Quitting is not making excuses, it’s learning to be more productive, efficient and effective instead. Quitting is letting go of things (or people) that are sucking the life out of you so you can do more things that will bring you strength.”

— Osayi Emokpae Lasisi, Impossible Is Stupid

On dark days, it's easy to lose hope. It's easy to get tired and get tempted to give up. But we might be right around the bend of something revolutionary. 

So today, instead of quitting my dream, i’m quitting the belief that my past will dictate my future. I have to keep pursuing the very thing that comes from deep with in me. I am, and always will be an Artist.

What about you? When are you tempted to quit? How do you battle your inner critic?
 

A Funny Thing happens When You Show Up...

Global Citizen's Word on Stage event at the NYU SKIRBALL CENTER.

Recently, I had the opportunity to attend a private Global Citizen's event, World on Stage. It was an evening filled with a who's who of influential people coming together for world change. Former Prime Ministers, executives of big business, musicians, actors, celebrities of all sorts, and even three NASA astronauts (WHAT?!). But I don't want to write a blog post filled with name dropping (ok, just one, Paul Simon showed up and played two songs...) or take away from the very important world issues that were discussed (poverty, clean water, gender equality...). Instead, there's another story I want to tell. How in the world did I find myself at this Global Citizen's private event in the first place? And How was I commissioned to create art centered on social issues, incorporating major headlining acts like Rihanna and Metallica?

The short answer is that I just kept showing up. Every day, doing the work and putting it out there. 

“Eighty percent of success is showing up.”

— Woody Allen

About three years ago, I was contacted by someone via Instagram, inquiring about commissioning me to do some art centered around a NYC central park event, the Global Citizen's festival. As it turned out, that person was Kweku Mandela (filmmaker, activist and yes, Nelson Mandela's grandson). How on earth did he come across my work? If memory serves me correctly, I had some a series of drawings based on some celebrities and influential people. One of those people was Caitlyn Crosby, singer-songwriter, actress, and founder of The Giving Keys. She loved the portrait I did of her so much she shared it on her own Instagram account. And Kweku follows her. Hence, the connection was made.

So, Kweku commissioned me to create some art for the Global Citizen's event in 2014. Then following year, he commissioned me to create some more art of the headlining musicians like Coldplay and Ed Sheeran, to share on social media. 

This year, Kweku contacted me about creating art of the five headlining acts placed in specific locations related to certain social issues. I created not only digital art to share on social media, but also physical matted prints that were handed to each artist following the main event. 

Five custom digital paintings for the headlining acts: Kendrick Lamar, Major Lazer, Rihanna, Demi Lovato, and Metallica. 

So how did I end up at the World on Stage event? Kweku graciously invited me to be his guest. I was finally able to meet him in person after a few years of working through emails and Instagram. I feel so very fortunate to have been connected to him, and to have been invited into the Global Citizen event, where I continued to leverage my art to help bring awareness. And to be a part of something for the greater good. 

I share this not to call attention to me or my work, but to hopefully encourage YOU. Do you have a dream you are pursuing (or want to)? Keep showing up. Keep sharing your work. Keep connecting to people you can serve with your art. Add value to other's lives. Leverage your creativity to benefit others. Don't just engage your talent, but your HEART. If you do, who know's the lives you might touch and the places you might end up. 

Today is a new day, filled with many opportunities to make an impact on the lives of others who are right around you. Maybe it's just to make someone smile, or bring awareness to an important issue. It probably looks different for each of us. But my challenge to you is to SHOW UP. You just might be able to offer just the very thing someone has been waiting for. 

A live sketch i created during Global Citizen's Word on Stage event at the NYU SKIRBALL CENTER, NYC, Thursday, September 22nd 2016.